I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
