There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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