your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize