how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
