If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
