The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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