okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
there was a trapeze. enough said
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
