I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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