it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
