He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
