Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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