that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
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