And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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