Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
