at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
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