seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
