it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Randomize
