the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
this just has baby written all over it
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
