On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
there's paper in my vomit.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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