Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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