it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
