So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
