You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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