after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize