I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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