exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
