You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
