If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
and you fell through a lawn chair
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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