Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Text me some of your sweat
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize