if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
