He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
