Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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