are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I wish life had little blips of pornography
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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