She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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