dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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