Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize