Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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