i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
