the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
