i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
