so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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