hell yes lets make some ravioli
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
