so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
