I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
