have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
