u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
