Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
