he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
