If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
