There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
My vagina is officially offended.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
