found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
