Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
